Sunday 12 January 2014

I told you so

The absolutely fantastic Trump International Golf Course
The absolutely fantastic Trump International Golf Course
at Menie Estate near Aberdeen
You know, you should always trust the expert planner. That's me! For all these years I have been beating the drum for our enterprising friends in the Aberdeen area. I have put up with death threats, suggested deportation and invitations to have certain parts of my body relocated to places where they don't belong.

Now last week I read an article in the Sunday Herald that confirms that the opening of the Trump International Links - God's Own Golf Course no less - has resulted in a golfing boom in the north east of Scotland. Well!  I knew this would happen! In a nutshell, bookings are up four-fold as golfers visit the area to play three or four courses. And Royal Aberdeen has been selected to host the Scottish Open Championship next year. Royal Aberdeen of course refuses to permit female members but this is a major attraction to most real men in the Aberdeen area.

The article goes on to describe Dr Donald's course as 'utterly inspiring' with 'real empathy for the land' and 'fitting in perfectly'. 'It is genuinely difficult to pick out highlights because there are so many'. Isn't this fantastic and a major body-blow to the frogs and newts that are now looking over the fence into their former home. The course was designed by Dr Martin Hawtree, the acknowledged master of links golf course architecture. The fact that it was designed by a Doctor is deeply impressive - I wouldn't mind signing up to be one of his patients!

Now all these despicable trolls living in their black houses and railway coaches who said this was a disaster have been proved to be completely wrong. They know nothing! Absolutely nothing! I've spoken before about the trickle-down effect of developments like this and have praised many such projects all over Scotland. This article demonstrated that trickle-down really works. Now all these inbred protestors and sandal-wearing middle class interfering nincompoops can stay at home and shut up.

This is a tremendous victory for the New Scottish Enlightenment and I have written personally to Dr Donald Trump today congratulating him on his foresight, his genius, his design talent and his beautiful wife. I have also pointed out my considerable and nationally regarded role as Expert Planner and Thought Leader and have offered my consultancy services to him on an exclusive basis - at an appropriate rate.

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